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"Those who go mad are merely thoughtful souls who failed to reach any conclusions." - Bloodborne

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Thursday, June 30, 2016

News Bit: 6/30/2016.

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Wednesday, June 15, 2016

You know what pisses me off? Cry bullies crying about Zelda.

I wanna address something. I've seen a NUMBER of these far left cry bully fuckwits bitching that Link is not female in the new Zelda game. This is not exactly a new thing but I'm seeing extra ridiculous things this time. I just saw a comment from a neogaf thread where someone said that Nintendo HATES women.

Are you insane? Are you genuinely fucked in the head? Is this really the company you want to be starting this shit with? Is it Nintendo? Honestly?

Let me tell you something about Nintendo in case you've conveniently forgotten. NINTENDO are the ones who practically INVENTED the bad ass female video game protagonist. Before Samus in the original Metroid game, that wasn't a thing. After Samus? It was a thing. EVERY great female game character that came after owes something to Samus and to Nintendo.

This is the company that has women, even Princess Peach, kicking actual ass in their Smash Bros series and racing right alongside the male characters in Mario Kart. This the company that features female characters front in center in the amazing Splatoon game and accompanying Amiibo. This is the company that SINGLE-HANDEDLY SAVED THE BAYONETTA SERIES, which features a very amazing female protagonist. Are you getting the picture yet?

Is this really the company you want to shit on over this? All because they wouldn't turn a male character into a female one just to appease your feelings? Let's be honest with each other, you don't REALLY give a shit about this, do you? No, of course not. You just want to look like a big white knight in shining armor in front of your lunatic acquaintances by pretending to care about this. Look at you, the big hero, fighting for women, going after a supposed EVIL COMPANY over some stupid made up bullshit.

I used the word ACQUAINTANCES not friends, because these people aren't your friends. These people hang around you for the same reason you hang around them. You all want to impress each other and feel good about yourselves by attacking anyone and anything that might make you seem for a brief moment like some kind of righteous gender warrior. These people will throw you under the bus, get in, drive over you and then back up to do it again if they thought it would gain them ANYTHING, even in the slightest degree.

Please take a step back and look at this situation from outside your circle of crazy people. And back the fuck off of Nintendo, they've done more for gaming and women in gaming than you could EVER hope to do.

Monday, June 13, 2016

You know what pisses me off? Bullshit about guns.

Hoo boy.

This is a hot topic so I thought I would weigh in. Everyone is talking about the shooting in Orlando and most of it is nonsense. Now, before I say anything, let me say that I'm NOT a right winger or Republican and I don't currently, as of writing this article, own any guns myself.

Whenever a tragedy happens, before the bodies are even cold, everyone has to jump in with their pet agenda. BAN ALL THE GUNS! BLAME WHITE MALES! IT'S THOSE VIOLENT VIDYA GAMES! Every single time. If you bring up radical terrorists or mental illness, you're labled as a bigot.

It's almost like these people are seriously working AGAINST humanity. They try and steer everyone way from actual issues and real solutions just so they can be heard saying something they think sounds good. All they care about is looking like they're so caring and tolerant and progressive.

Let me make this very clear. At least in America, you aren't going to ban all the guns, okay? You aren't. I don't care how much you want to or how much you think the country would be a paradise if you did. It's not going to happen. It's not reality and it's not realistic. Do you realize how many guns we have in the USA? Go Google it. Ask that question and see what answers you get.

There are more guns in the United States than there are people. How are you going to ban them? Magic wand? You gonna teleport them to your safe space with all your hair dye and coloring books? Do you even realize what would happen if the government actually tried to ban guns? You'd have a mob of thousands, perhaps hundreds of thousands of armed people march on DC and take it apart brick by brick.

Guns are part of our culture. It's part of the DNA of this country, it's in the constitution. My personal belief is that the world would be better without guns... but only SLIGHTLY better. I don't think it would be as good as many people might think. If you look at history you'll see that humanity had no trouble at all being shitty and comitting terrible acts before guns were invented. They only help... a little.

We need better early detection and treatment for mental health issues. We need to do a better job routing out radicals in religious groups and defeating organizations like ISIS that, in case you hadn't heard, called for attacks like this during Ramadan.

Listen, maybe you don't believe me after this rant, but I consider myself to be politically liberal. I just gave up on believing in gun control because it's complete fantasy. It's impossible to do and wouldn't do much good anyway. No political idealogy should come before the truth. And the truth is, we aren't going to ban all the guns so stop the bullshit and maybe push for some ACTUAL solutions.

Thanks for putting up with my little rant. What do you think about all this? Leave me a comment below.

Tuesday, June 7, 2016

Crab Battle Preparedness Kit.

As you probably already know, the threat of crab battle is an ever present shadow that hangs over us constantly. With the right tools, and a little luck, you may survive one should it ever occur. Here's what you need.

The Cheat Sheet

Keep this image handy at all times. I have it printed out and stuck on the wall right next to where I sit. I suggest you do the same, maybe print out a few extra copies to hand out to friends and family.

The Music

Keep this song handy, perhaps on your phone or other device that you can access quickly.

Orbital Strike

After you have the cheat sheet, the music and have studied it carefully and practiced the dance moves, it's time for the final step. After the crab(s) have been confused you must nuke the site of the crab battle from orbit. I suggest moving all of your friends, family, pets and possessions at least 200 miles from the site beforehand.

Hopefully this has helped you. Please share it with everyone you know so they might also be prepared if the worst were to happen.