Still no respect... with much love to the late, great Rodney Dangerfield.

I get no respect... I went to a meeting but there was no one there, no one wanted to meet me!

I once had to eat out at a Chinese place, they wanted me to eat the food outside the restaurant.

I took my son to the doc, they told me he was retarded and gave me a tag for my car, so I could park in the special spots. They told me I'd have to double park in two of them because he's also really ugly. I told 'im he gets his looks from his mother, the doc said he should give 'em back!

No respect, let me tell you something. I had my picture in the paper, a friend of mine called and said someone had finally taken a good picture of bigfoot.

I bought one of those new Xbox systems, I was so terrible at the games that I got an achievement for turning it off!

If I had a nickel for every time someone gave me a compliment, I'd have all of two cents.